President Obama rushed to hospital
Holocaust™ News Service- Washington, DC 15 Nissan, 5769
President Obama was rushed to a local emergency room this evening, while hosting a SEDER in the White House, celebrating the most holy Jewish Passover.
"I don't know what happened, commented Obama's social secretary, Samantha Tubman. "The President was doing what he usually does whenever he has his Jewish Masters over. Obama was on his knees, kissing Rabbi's rings and a certain body part which I won't mention, due to National Security, when he started having trouble breathing and collapsed."
"Herbie" Ziskend, aide to Vice President Biden, said "Obama was being the complete gracious and subservient host, just the way us Chosen Ones like to see the American president act, when he started gasping for air. This is most distressing to the Rabbi's attending the first ever SEDER hosted by a sitting president. This could call into question Obama's loyalty to Israel."
Lisa Kohnke, the White House deputy director of advance and special events, said Obama might of had a reaction to licking all of those Matzo Balls. "I've seen this before, said Kohnke. "Some GOY politician tries to lick every Matzo Ball in the room and has a reaction to all of that grease dripping off those balls."
At press time, the White House, Capt. Jeff Kuhlman, MD Obama's personal physician , said Obama was resting comfortably and would return to servicing his Jewish Masters tomorrow.
White House videographer Arun Chaudhary said he had recorded the entire event and would rush the footage to Tel Aviv, where the Supreme Rabbinical Council would view Obama's transgressions and decide upon a proper punishment.
For Holocaust™ news, I'm Bennie Dipschitz reporting from the White House.